You Are Not Alone
“We read to know we are not alone.”
- C. S. Lewis
One of the scariest things we have to do in our life is to do something for the first time, by ourselves. It may be walking to school or riding a bike or driving a car. As we get older, we have these same issues, whether it is personal or professional, where we feel that we are fighting our dragons all by ourselves.
When we feel alone in an endeavor or fighting through a problem our resilience hits rock bottom. “Why me?” We ask ourselves, and there is no response. Because there is no response, we start to fill the void with negativity. We begin to blame other people. We blame outside entities. We feel a little better because we have taken the blame away from us, but that doesn’t solve the problem.
The simple solution is that we can’t do this thing (life) all alone. Being a lone wolf may seem cool, but the sad truth is that the lone wolf doesn’t survive very long. And why should you be a lone wolf? You are surrounded by the answers you need.
These answers can be found in your “Circle of Resilience”. This circle is made up of poets, authors, musicians, actors, mentors, friends, family, peers and your Quarters. We are, truly, never alone. If we are stuck or are frustrated all we need to do is to reach out.
What do I mean by “reach out”? It’s as easy as pushing a button. You can open the pages of a book who has provided you solace in the past. You can pick up your phone and text your mentor or a peer. You can call them or walk down the hall and stick your head in their door and ask them the questions that you are struggling with. And the in no time, the right answers are always there.
Soon you will understand two things. First you will get an answer to your problem. Second, your resilience bank will be full because you will have realized that you are never truly alone! You are not fighting through the problems in your life by yourself. You are surrounded by those who are willing to get you back on your path so your journey can continue.
We all have people, ideas and processes that help keep us moving towards what we want out of life. Here are five of items in my “Circle of Resilience”:
1. Poetry:
- William Ernest Henley wrote a poem about resilience entitled “Invictus”. Nelson Mandela found it useful, I find that it pushed me forward daily.
- Stephen Crane wrote a poem about chasing your dreams and not letting anyone dissuade you, entitled, “I Saw a Man Pursuing the Horizon”. This has gotten me where I am at today.
2. Music:
- Bruce Springsteen’s music has been a soundtrack to my life since I was introduced to his music in high school. His message of resilience and strength drives me forward when I forget my “why”.
- Stevie Ray Vaughn’s music can always turn a day around. The way that he gives everything to his music reminds me that life is short and we need to maximize every day.
3. Books:
- “The Five Rings” – Miyamoto Musashi. Musashi, the 61-0 samurai, lived a life of challenging what was accepted. Changing what was needed to be changed and to live a simple life.
- “The Last Lecture” – Randy Pausch. Pausch reminds me that the brick walls that are place in my way, aren’t there to stop me but to see how much I really want what’s on the other side.
4. Mentors:
- Mom and Pops: Mom was the ultimate cheerleader who never felt anything was unobtainable. Pops didn’t accept anything less than your best.
- Coaches / Teachers: Ed Lenius – Dr. George Morgan – Tim Weiss – John Stucky – Scotty Conley, all taught me to be prepared and to never stop climbing to obtain your dreams.
5. Quarters:
- They are always there to remind me that I’m not through. I still have not accomplished all that I can.
- They will answer my questions with the truth, no matter how much I don’t want to hear it, but because I need to hear it.
These five ensure that I will never be alone. Even though I may be sitting at my desk in my “outer office” all by myself, they are always around me. When I lose focus on my “why” (why am I doing what I am doing) they will help be get back on track.
Find YOUR circle. I have hundreds in mine (remember the circle of resilience is different than your Quarters). They all lift me. They reset my positive messaging when the day might have started slow. Because of this circle I am able to work every day – without ever worrying about what time it is or how long I have been working on a project.
Your circle pushes your passion forward. It doesn’t set limits to how far you can go; it only tells you that you can make it – IF you are willing to outwork everyone else.
Have an amazing day!
